Tuesday, January 21, 2014


Hi, this blog has moved!  You can find me at www.thirzacuthand.com now, I imported this whole blog over there too, so you can peruse it there if you want.  Otherwise, I am keeping this around for a while, so don't worry about losing me just yet!  But yeah, new posts will be at my own domain!  Thanks for sticking around so long!  I hope to entertain you even more at my personal artist site!

Monday, January 13, 2014

White Tears

I got this really weird message today from a friend who told me some white guy accused me of being a bully and unfriended her because she agreed with me about something on facebook that happened in November!  He had said this First Nations veteran who brought a Mohawk Warrior flag to a Remembrance Ceremony was being disruptive and deserved to get arrested, and I had disagreed because that Veteran had brought that flag to Remembrance Day ceremonies before with no problems!  Anyway, I'm the big Native bully now.  White tears.

Whatever, that's not what this whole post is gonna be about at all, I just found it so remarkable that I needed to mention it.

I died in HabitRPG.  I died on Sunday and since then I got serious about it and have been working SUPER HARD at accomplishing my goals.  Most of them are basic things like Wake Up Early (11am counts as early for me, but I'm gonna push it back to 10am), floss, eat breakfast.  Some are chores like making supper and cleaning my room and doing laundry and stuff.  So today I cleaned the bathroom hoping I could get my sword back.  Oh yes, and I lost my sword when I died!  I have NOTHING!  Mom is totally happy about this making me do chores and stuff.  It does make the grim realities of life seem more enjoyable!  Like, I have flossed every day this week for the points. 

My transcript showed up today, so I scanned and uploaded it.  Also now I am able to see all of my marks.  There was one spring session and one fall session that were just horrible.  I actually failed a class, and I don't even remember taking it!  Like, did I even go to that class?  It's got me baffled!  I remember the instructor was just teaching us webpage building out of a book in the first session of it, and then the second, it's like a big blank in my head!  I remember I was having hardcore mental health problems in that semester.  It was really hard.  I got C's in almost all my classes except the one I got an F in.  But I also made a film that I won an award for, soooooo, whatever, grades are weird.

Anyway, if anything is gonna fuck me over, it's that semester.  The rest of my marks were mainly B's, B+, B-, B.  They told me in first year that A was for Art Student.  But that's not so helpful when you later want to go to Grad school.  B is for Busy Student. C is for Can't Deal. F is for Fuckkkkkkkk.

I'm doing pretty good otherwise, I hope I get notified if I got into Grad School in March, because then I can do my Canada Council Grant for the March 31 deadline. 

I went with my Mom to the Field House today and we walked the track.  We only did half an hour.  It was really nice, Mom says you only have to do half an hour of exercise three times a week, but I kind of liked when I would do an hour.  Anyway, I am just starting again, so I should ease myself into it anyway.

My Mars books showed up today.  I read the beginning of The Case For Mars by Robert Zubrin.  I'm gonna read more before I go to sleep.  I think I used to have that book, I left it at the apartment I was subletting in Montreal a long time ago.  Anyway, it has been updated.  And I also got Destination Mars by Rod Pyle. 

Grandma has rallied.  She is really tired, but she's stopped going super downhill.  I hope she's okay, but I will also understand when she passes.  It's a weird situation.  Aging and dying, or not dying.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Tattoo Part 1!

I got tattooed yesterday!  It's the cherry blossoms I have been wanting forever.  Here are some pics of them:

I have learned I can do about 2.5 hours of tattooing before reaching my pain threshold and needing to stop.  So that's how much work this was, plus one hour of drawing the branches on me and placing the blossoms, buds, and leaves.  There's a lot more colour to put in, including some blue on the outside.  I'm really happy with it so far.  In a month after this heals I am going back to get the rest!

I am getting this tattoo because cherry blossoms have a special significance in my life.  When I lived in Vancouver for nearly a decade I would get depressed every winter because of the gloomy grey skies and lack of sun.  Like, suicidally depressed.  And I always promised myself I wouldn't do anything drastic until I saw the cherry blossoms in spring.  And it worked, because by the time the cherry blossoms came out, the sun would be back and my mood would have lifted.  For a while I thought about getting magnolias on my arm, but even though those were nice too, it was really the cherry blossoms that I liked.  There were so many of them.

I feel super tattooed now that I have close to a half sleeve on my left arm.  I have more tattoos in mind.  I want to get Little Mister's paw pads tattooed on me somewhere.  Not sure where yet.  I might save my heart area for my future wife.  I'm also contemplating a tattoo for my grandma.  I'm torn between two mittens with a string on them or a cinnamon bun.  OR two mittens with a string HOLDING a cinnamon bun, which is what someone suggested.  It would be super cute!  But that's for the future.  And I want to put a thunderstorm with a thunderbird on the other side of my right arm with the dragon tattoo.  Because in Cree mythology, Thunderbirds and Snakes are enemies, and my dragon is very snakey.  So that conflict might make my arm make more sense in the Cree way.

Ha ha, Cree Way is the name of the rez gas station here in Saskatoon.  There are actually a few rez gas stations, there is also Firecreek and English River's station in Grasswood. 

OHHHHHH!  There is one other tattoo I've wanted for a while that is super funny.  I want an exploding cherry bomb on my ass cheek.  Like, a really cartoony one.  It's just something I have thought about for a long time that makes me smile.  I wouldn't be able to see it, but that's okay, my future lovers will have something to laugh about. 

It's Saturday night and I am at home!  Today Mom and I went to the matinee of American Hustle AND later we went to the Casino! I won 42 bucks! :D I was betting 20 lines at 2 cents a bet!  On Lucky Meerkats.  I was on a real streak, I got three of those little guys with the capes and two wilds so I won 20 bucks, and then I won 20 bucks on a bonus! :D

Happy happy!

I'm pretty alright otherwise.  I have no local crushes.  Only celebrities and old far away friends.  Oh, and I guess some standby crushes I've just carted around for so long that I have nearly forgotten about them.  I need to get to some major queer event that involves international homos.  And have a fling.  Or get a sexy penpal.  Or something.  OR find someone who wants to move to Canada.  Pshaw, there probably is someone cute in Canada I could date, if I really went out looking.

Thursday, January 09, 2014

Old Habits Die Hard

My friend Becca posted about this site called HabitRPG.com.  It basically makes your life an RPG, with points earned and lost and you can buy armour and weapons with coins and it's all based in doing life tasks, which can be whatever you want.  I just signed up today, so far I have household chores, grooming habits, sleep habits, and work/creative work that I need to do.  Also there are habits, daily things, and a to do list, and they all give you different points depending on how hard and how often you do them.  It seems like a really good idea.  It's like Mary Poppins telling the kids to make cleaning a game. 

Today I did some work, saw my Grandma and Grandpa, and did some research on space stuff by watching a recent transmission from the ISS.  I'm really tired, I should go to bed. 

Little Mister is getting better everyday.  Tomorrow is his last dose of painkillers.  I hope that's all he needs.  He won't let me open his mouth to see his teeth, so I take quick looks when he yawns. They look good though, and he is starting to realize his teeth are better and don't hurt.

I'm still waiting for my transcript.  It's been a while.  I might have to ask them tomorrow to fax it to me.  Which means I have to find a fax machine I can use.  I really want to get this application finished, it's freaking me out!

I'm really really really tired!  I think I should go sleep.  I have a dentist appointment tomorrow.  I have to be there at 12:50pm.  I don't want to sleep in!

Tuesday, January 07, 2014

Perked up

This morning Little Mister was VERY SAD!  He was walking around crying, I gave him his painkiller and antibiotic and after about an hour he was much happier.  Later today he was wagging his tail and being generally happy.  His teeth look so nice, whiter, brighter, and he has really nice breath.  He had such stinky breath before his teeth got done!  It's amazing how different it is!

We got Grandma new clothes from The Bay.  Two sweaters and two pants.  She liked them.

When we were at the Bay I was standing by the MAC counter and ended up buying Ruby Woo.  It's kind of funny, because the last time I got lipstick was when I was fourteen, and it lasted ten years.  So I anticipate this one will last just as long, since I hardly wear it.

I don't really have good lips for lipstick.  My top lip is so thin.  I have Grandma's lips.  Maybe I should get injections.  No, never mind, that's not a good idea.

I'm waiting for my cheque to arrive, also I have started doing research for simulating weightlessness.  I originally wasn't gonna do weightlessness in my film, but if I can come up with a simple solution I might revisit it.  I was reading about how they did the weightlessness on Big Bang Theory.  They were supported from a platform below and also the actors mimicked microgravity.

Think think think.

Being strapped in also makes things easier.

Tiny Hermione insisted on sleeping with me tonight, we were trying to get her to go sleep with Mom, but instead she made a bed in my room until I let her come onto my bed.  Poor Mum, I hope she doesn't feel rejected.

I'm tired, I got up early to give Little Mister his medicine.  I should get to sleep so I can wake up and do it again tomorrow.  Also I have a meeting tomorrow afternoon. 

I'm also waiting for my transcript to come from ECUAD.  I need to scan it and upload it to Ryerson to finish my application.  It's making me antsy.  Yikes!

Monday, January 06, 2014

Dentistry for Dogs

Little Mister went to the vet this morning, he got his teeth done.  They cleaned them and did a few extractions, one molar and some incisors which are the tiny front teeth.  I picked him up just after four, he was happy to see me, but when he got home he was mostly laying around with moist eyes like he was gonna burst into tears.  Poor little guy.  He's on soft food for the next couple of weeks, and he's got painkillers for the next three days and antibiotics for the next week, in addition to the last week of antibiotics.  He had a bandage from his IV fluids, I took it off tonight though because it was bugging him and he wasn't bleeding anymore anyway.  The vet tech showed me his little teeth in a steel bowl, poor guy.  They said one just fell out because it was so bad.

I wish I had gotten his teeth done sooner, but I had to wait until I had money.  Sucks.

He was so groggy when we picked him up that I cancelled his grooming appointment until next week.  He also has another appointment to see the vet next week to check on how his gums are doing.

I hope he recovers soon.  They say dental work in senior dogs can really perk them up in the end.  Apparently it slows them down when they have that bacteria going around their bloodstream. 

He was such a sad guy before though, he was having trouble eating because his teeth hurt him.  Poor little guy! 

I'm glad he's going to be able to enjoy life again.  I'm going to start brushing his teeth when he's healed up.  Hopefully he'll be able to eat hard food again.  Especially since my guilt over his bad teeth has lead me to buy him canned dog food that costs four bucks a can!  He's getting some super gourmet shit! 

He got soft cheese for his snack tonight, I usually give him a cookie, but I thought he would appreciate something softer. 

In other news, I can't talk too much about what is going on with my Grandma, but it looks like there will be a death in the family in the not too distant future.  I am spending more time with her, and we are trying to make sure she is comfortable.  She's happy now that she knows we aren't letting her get any more tests.  The doctors want to do this really invasive test on her, but we found out another elderly person died of shock getting that test, so we have not consented for her to get it.  I can't really say much else, because I am keeping this business of dying to myself and her close family members.  But I am hoping she has a very peaceful end.  If she goes in her sleep that would be the best. She's gotten so old and frail, and she is not having a very good quality of life.  So as hard as it is to say goodbye to my Grandma, I also am feeling better that she will finally pass away in the not too distant future.  I think it really hasn't hit me yet, and I will probably be extremely sad when she does die.  Grief is a weird thing.  I might write more about it in another post, this one was mostly about Mister's teeth, but I feel like I should be sort of open about what is going on in my life.