Sunday, August 30, 2009

Posters of the Missing

My cat is still missing. It will be a week on Tuesday. I really miss him. I keep thinking about him and hoping he didn’t meet an ugly end at the hands of some cruel twisted individual(s).

There is entirely too much evil in the world. I was reading about the highway of tears and how now they think they have a suspect in the murders, although so far they are only looking for one woman’s body, and that one woman is white. For those who don’t know what the highway of tears is, it’s a stretch of highway running from Prince George to Prince Rupert where for the last 40 years primarily aboriginal women have been going missing while hitchhiking.

The suspect is in prison for murdering his brother. The police are digging up the property and looking in a well that smells like diesel and might have been used to burn something. They even have special dogs that can locate remains, and a ground penetrating radar device.

I could never work in forensics or criminology. I think it would be a very bleak feeling dealing with that kind of evil day in and day out. Bleakness is a terrible feeling. That kind of loss of belief in human goodness.

There ARE good people in the world still. I know this. My cat could have adopted himself into another family of nice people. But I still think he would come home because they wouldn’t know him well enough to know he likes Friskies.

A missing cat and a missing woman are not the same things. I know this. There won’t be an investigation into where my cat went, and if someone did do something to him, he or she (but probably he) will most likely get away with it. But then it makes me think about all the unsolved cases of missing and murdered Aboriginal women and how sometimes it seems as if our lives are equal to those of cats. Just more faces peering out of faded posters, dotting the landscape, reminding us that we are not safe or protected.

I wish my cat had been an indoors cat. I feel guilty for letting him go outside this summer at mum’s. And now I’m in limbo, wondering if I will ever see his sweet face again.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Schrodinger!!! :(

My beautiful Schrodinger cat is missing!! He could be alive or dead, we really don't know. In the meantime we are keeping check of the cats at the SPCA and handing out flyers and putting up posters and going up and down alleys calling his name.

I know I always talk about my dog Mister here, but Schrodinger is like the salt to Mr's pepper. He was a best friend of mini dachshunds and played so well with them. He would wrestle and kick and grab them by the head and he could be sweet too, bathing them or just snuggling with them. And he was very intuitive about illnesses, one time I was sick for a week and he stayed right next to me nearly the whole time.

I'm really sad about my missing kitty. He was my first pet when I moved from Vancouver, I got him as a little kitten when he would try to kill me all the time. I just about strangled him! And then he got snugglier over the past couple years and now he is missing!

I feel like a bad mom for letting him go outside at my mum's for the summer. But he really did like the outdoors life. I hope to god he is on an adventure and will come home soon.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Internetted and Recovering

I finally have the internet again. And I am also recovering from one of the worst colds I have had in a while. I was a ball of snot, coughing and coughing and just drenched in mucus and sweat. It was godawful!

I also recently got pierced, again, the same piercing I had when I was nineteen, a hood. I haven't been able to do anything with it besides clean it and wince when I bump it wiping my bum. So I can't really report if it is improving my sex life yet. But it did the last time I had this piercing, so I'm pretty excited. The procedure of getting pierced itself was obviously very painful. Having a large needle and then some jewelery shoved through your privates is never very fun, unless you like that sort of thing. I don't so much but I do like the results.

Some things have changed. I've started taking Wellbutrin in addition to my Celexa, and it seems to be cheering me up at any rate. It's supposed to bring back my sex drive, so far the jury is still out on that, especially since I can't do much with a healing hood piercing. I've also been seeing a counselor for the past few weeks, and that's been helping a bit with some issues I've talked about here.

I shot some more footage for my video and now need to finish writing the narration and record it, and then finish editing, and then write my final report, and I'm DONE! My first half hour video. I must say I am nervous about keeping attention for half an hour. It seems like an unruly time period for a short video artist. Rather, a video artist that makes shorts. Although I'm not super tall either. I really want this done soon because I would like to get my next grant. I'm working hard on it!

Oh man, at least I am finally feeling better. My nose isn't running so much anymore either, which is a relief. I was getting tired of snuffling and blowing it all the time. Thank god for kleenex with lotion!

Either way, I have to go to work today, so I should probably go meet my mom and do some stuff and get to work. I will write more when I have some time.