Monday, September 27, 2004

Kiss that Social Anxiety Better


Over the past year I've noticed my social anxiety running amok again. Le sigh. It's pretty silly really, I get all queasy and my hands shake. Shake shake shake. Shake that booty. Damn, that would be funny, if my butt shook instead of my appendages. I wonder if it would be easier to hide. Someone told me that shaky hands are just a medication side effect. Could be true. Sometimes my hands shake when I'm not even thinking about being in public, with everyone's googly eyes looking at me. It's a bit of a liability when you're holding a cup of hot coffee.
Has that ever happened to you? Holding something hot, like soup or tea or whatever, and you get all shaky or spill it on yourself AND IT BURNS!!! Ahhhhhh! But you can't just drop it. And so you have to be all burning, finding a spot to put it down. Ouch!!! Kiss it better someone quick!
What's with that, the kiss it better thing? Kissing something never makes it feel better, except that in your heart you get the warm fuzzies that someone cares enough to put their lips to your ouchie.
Is that even safe these days? I guess no one kisses gross ouches, like oozing bleeding roadburn from a spill on your bike.
When I was a kid my mum would always get so upset when one of us got cuts and the like. She couldn't handle blood very well. She'd say "Ooo, eee, ouch, ah." It was like she was the one who was hurt. I remember barricading myself in the bathroom so I could dig out gravel from my knee without her making me feel worse. Once my sister got all mad one day and threw a bowl on the floor and broke it, then stepped on a huge shard and cut the bottom of her foot open. Mom couldn't even look at it, even as this huge puddle of blood appeared. (Okay, so this is a gross story) So I had to be the one to declare that we needed to go to the hospital. Have you ever tried to take a hundred and thirty pound angry bleeding mentally handicapped woman to the hospital? It's quite an adventure really.
But that's not about social anxiety is it?
Sometimes being crazy in public is kind of goofy, I'm all "ha ha, la le la la, don't pay attention to my little hand quiver."
It's a bit rude to point out a crazy person's symptoms. I've had people IN PUBLIC point to my hands and be all "LOOK AT THAT!! ARE YOU EVER SHAKING!! WHY ARE YOU SHAKING!" And I'm all "shuddup!"
Maybe I should get people to kiss my little hand tremors better. It would be cute if someone who liked me did that, just for your future reference, if you are someone with a wee crush.

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