Saturday, May 09, 2009

Needs Curtains

The first time I went crazy I ripped all the curtains off the windows. And the weird thing is I remember how much work went into those cheap little curtains. A friend remarked how he had never gone into a house without curtains before.

I don't have curtains again, but I didn't rip them down in a fit of pique this time. They just never got put up. I was standing on my bed today and looking out the window and thinking to myself: If I ever want to convince someone cute to have sex in this room, I ought to have some curtains. After all, one never knows when something particularly acrobatic could occur.

Don't ask why I was standing on the bed.

Since lighting this love candle I've felt small changes in my life. My libido's going back to normal instead of non-existent, and I'm noticing cute women, and I'm actually curious about who I'm going to meet. Instead of just feeling sad about my last affair.

I mean look, I must be nesting if I am thinking about curtains. It's the practical things.

And I admit I have had some smokes. But I really am quitting this time. I keep putting my patch on and go for several hours before smoking. But even that has to stop, and it will.

I think I have an addictive personality. I like things that can fit in my routine and make me feel better. Like writing, or coffee, or cigarettes or any of my other vices. Well, writing's not a vice, except when you're suffering extreme hypergraphia and have manic energy and a world wide platform like the internet.

I've definitely had an interesting life so far. And I'm 31 years old now! I'm getting old. I still don't have many white hairs, but they are there. Actually I've found white hairs starting when I was nineteen. But there weren't many, ever, even now. My Grandpa's 90 and some of his hair is still dark, he doesn't have much dark hairs left, but still, at 90!

I had my bipolar duty to go get blood levels checked since they hadn't been checked since October! Anyway, I had thought it would be a smooth operation (I don't know why, my veins are little titchy goobs that no one can find!) so I was watching her put the needle in and then she couldn't get anything out of me but one feeble spurt. So she got another nurse (or technician or whatever they are) to do it and she got it really fast and it didn't involve all that poking around the last one did. OH MAN! I thought I was tough but I got a total queasy tummy looking at all that and all that pain and I was worried I was gonna throw up. And still I had to get a prescription and an appointment with the nurse, all while just wanting to go pop some gravol.

By the way, ginger gravol really works!

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