Monday, April 02, 2007

Life


I think for four years I had trouble accessing both memories of my life, one life that was doing the girl thing, and the other that was doing a boy thing. But even though I am a guy there is still the whole girl thing going on, which is nice. I like being kind of a marshmallow. Sometimes. But then other times I wish people wouldn't try to tell me I can't do stuff, because that drives me crazy. Because usually I just want to do nice things, really, because I know when stuff gets mean. But sometimes your gender gets used against you! Because people don't honestly believe anymore that someone could understand what it means to be masculine and feminine and still choose the place they like best. Or even what gifted people are like, which is intense, because their brains just spin these amazing things. You so can't tell what they are up to unless you know they're being cared for properly. And gifted people are still so unknown.

I mean, raising a gifted child is a bizarre job, because they want to know the meaning of life as soon as they show up. And they have such intense emotions, it's bizarre, to see so much passion in someone who can move on later. And it makes everything really intense, so high school politics between gifted individuals gets equally intense. But since high school is a model for society, everyone could kind of figure out from their own standpoint where things went wrong. It was chaos theory at it's finest. And it was brutal, high school was so brutal, just because everyone kept raising the bar to see how high it could go. And I think that was hard on the regular students, who also went to school with us, because we were doing weird shit! And they never knew what.

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