So that's why you guys feel like God!
Since I've begun embodying my gender more fully, the world reacts differently to me. Guys actually move off the sidewalk out of the way, it's intense. And I can look people in the eye and it's cool, no one hassles me. And I walk the way I normally walk too. And cars actually stop for me now, which is intense. I'm kind of glad I put this off so I could see the differences. Male privilege is no joke man. I'm so astounded, it's bizarre, this is so weird!
But I'm trying to remember how to do my part. I'm cleaning more, which is intense, because it's just this nice non violent activity. It sounds silly, but it is like a spiritual practice, to clean your own space. And to make your own food. God, I sound like my mother! Crap, but it's true, but if you're still stuck to a binary it's hard to be mindful of those things.
I didn't realize how different other people's lives are. I was listening to music and reading a book, and my mom said "You can't do those two things at once, your brain shuts off half of it." And I was like, what the hell do you mean? Of course I can do both these things at once. I can do a bunch of things at once. I was listening to LA Woman and reading Gender Outlaw. Now I'm listening to Moby's Everything Is Wrong and playing Katamari and cleaning. Laurel is coming over tonight and we're going out to goof off, I don't know what kind of transformation she's undergone, but she says I won't recognize her.
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